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[um. WHAT-] He said I didn't care..!?

[So evidently that's not true.] ...I did care about what happened..! But that wasn't the 4th's fault..! He wasn't the one who picked a spot...and he can't see everything! I told him that, and I even said that if he wanted...

[She trails off, not wanting to obviously admit her offer to Robbie to Ron instead. Reira curls up in her seat, frowning.] ...I tried to explain things. ...But every time I tried to say it was my fault, he acted like I was just saying it to make him feel bad.

So you care, right? [ He's pretty sure that's what she's saying. ] I think he thinks you don't like him anymore...

But... but you said Fog God was bad for things, and now Fourth God is doing things that hurt too... I don't get it. Why is only one bad, nee-san? That doesn't make any sense...

I got mad at him because he was mean to Tsukikage, and won't say sorry. That was it, [she insists. And indeed, at this point...that is all. For now.

Still. She looks down.] ...The Fog God was trying to take power from another god, [she explains carefully.] ...Enough power that everyone would be in danger even more. ...since he couldn't just stop her, he tried to beat her to it. That was why he needed conduits, but...

...Ron, you have to listen, okay? Even though he told me that something bad would happen to the places we picked... ...I still picked mine. And so did all of the others. But hurting people, and making people die in them, that wasn't what he did..!

Robbie got stuck in the middle of the lake with Tsukikage-that was what Sora said! But that doesn't make it the 4th's fault-it doesn't even make it the Fog's fault..! The people that picked the lake, they're why Robbie died..!

..and... [She goes rather quiet.] ...I didn't think about where I was picking properly. ...I just wanted to show him the park, and for him to have fun. ...Even though I was warned, I picked it. ....that's why the park was my fault. I think from all of us...

...Your spot was the best.

...No one got hurt at your spot, right?

They had a fight, but I don't really know what happened... Does daddy hate uncle Robbie now...? They're brothers. [ In his own little family tree, that's what they are. She has definitely seen his little chart of their family on a paper on his wall. He gets a bit better what happened between Robbie and Tsukikage the longer Reira talked though. ]

I didn't pick. He didn't say it was dangerous to do it but, but people died... D-daddy did too- I mean, p-people did and, and I didn't know but... but it's BAD. If it's not Fourth God's fault it's my fault, and that means, that mean's it- it's MY fault that d-daddy-- [ Keeping secrets is hard, and he knows he's bad at it. He hopes Reira hasn't figured it out, even though he's pretty much said it by now, almost twice in this conversation alone. ]

And, and no one got hurt in my spot, I don't know, no one's said so, but... but I helped make it w-worse.... [ Now, the tears start to roll down his cheeks. It's complicated, and Ron isn't good with those kind of things, it's breaking his little heart. ]

Of course he doesn't..! That's why I got mad... ...Because Robbie just talks about how everyone is mad at him, and no one wants to listen, but then when we try, he ignores it..!

...He hurt Tsukikage, and even though Tsukikage would want to talk, Robbie won't do it. [Her eyes widen however, and she hurriedly grabs the other one.] No!

The people who wanted everyone dead caused that part, remember? They were the ones on the laptop!

They were the ones who wanted everyone dead, and started attacking people. It's not your fault, okay? No one fought over your spot either, right? [She adds, trying to calm the other.] And the people on the computers were going to kill all the followers too, not just us.

...So it's not your fault. Not for anything.

Then, then why can't they m-make up...? [ He just wants his family to be together again. It doesn't feel right that one of them is avoiding the others in the house, to the point of moving out, like Reira had done before. ] If, if they just n-need to talk...

But they w-wanted us dead cuz we de-destroyed things.

N-nee-san, I've done l-lots of b-bad things, I don't, I don't know if, if, I can say it's not, not my f-fault anymore. [ It might be big thoughts for such a young child, but he's learned how wrong the things he did in his own world were, and when you combine it with the guilt of Tsukikage's death, that most definitely was his fault, he was sure of that no matter what anyone said, it was taking its toll on him. ]

Because Robbie won't.

[That was all.] ...They wanted us dead because they didn't know what we were doing. ...And even if that's our fault, what happened after isn't. We might have made those places have problems, but we also promised not to say anything about it-just like he promised not to do this ever again. [Or at least, she's pretty sure he did.

Reira sighs, and tries to change the topic a little.]

Ron, remember what I said about when monsters get hungry?

...Did you know...that Tsukikage had that happen to him, before?

I'll, what, how do I f-fix them? [ Never having had a family before, he doesn't know how it was really supposed to be solved when family fought, and so... the answer is that he has to do something or he's going to lose them. ]

D-do you still t-trust God...? [ He has to ask. Because right now, he can't. ]

H-he did? He w-was hungry...?

...I don't know. [She looks down.] ...Robbie won't listen to me. ...I don't think he'll listen to anyone, even if they tell him Tsukikage isn't mad.

...But Tsukikage forgot to eat once. ...And to stop him... ...they had to kill him. Tsukikage is always pushing himself to do things for us. And he's really good. ...Right now, the 4th isn't strong enough to make it so that he doesn't have to eat but...

...even though we know the places would be ruined, we knew that if we didn't do anything, the Fog God would take them instead. ...When you go into the forest that she took, you get hungry. ...Hungry for everything. The forest makes you bigger, scarier, hungrier...

...it's the same as if you forget to eat.

...I trust him. He's my best friend, and he tries his best to do what's right! [Reira insists.] ...And... ...And that's why I'm saying it again!

What happened isn't your fault..! We might have ruined those places...and people got angry... ...but if we didn't do that, something really, really bad would have happened, okay Ron?

...And... ...I don't want people to say it's alright to me, [She adds.] ...Because..you're right, people like Robbie still got hurt. And they should be mad. We can't be upset if they're mad.

...But you're allowed to do that and still know that you did the right thing.

B-but if he w-won't listen, how can I f-f-fix it? I gotta m-make it good again, I don't, I don't want to lose anyone, if, if they don't make up I'll be alone again, I don't wanna l-lose them... [ The thought of not being able to do anything to get them to listen, to get Robbie to listen is devastating. ]

I, I didn't p-protect daddy good enough...

No! Doing bad things can't be sometimes bad and sometimes good, that's not, that's not how it works. I don't, bad isn't right, I thinked it was right before in my world, we tried to, to almost destroy the whole w-world and I thinked it was right but it was just BAD, so, so it can't be right to do bad things now, that, I can't, that doesn't work...! [ There was no way Reira could have thought Ron would understand that, not after having been taught that hurting people is bad, and the people he'd murdered hadn't deserved it.

Another thought strikes him. ]

N-nee-san, you can't be best f-friends with a God, you w-worship them and th-they're above u-us...

You won't have to lose anyone though..! We can talk to Draco, or...or find someone else to talk to them..!

...We just have to wait a little, until Robbie calms down, and...

[...And it's really hard to respect this secret while also making you feel good.] It's not that we did 'bad', Ron..! This isn't like doing bad things like destroying the world, or...or killing people, okay? It's that something bad happened!

Like when you... ...Like when you spill some ice cream! [she tries quickly.] ...Even though it's a bad thing, you didn't do something that was wrong, right? It wasn't something evil, right?

[And it is here that Reira grows rather stone faced. Ron.]

...You don't worship the 4th, Ron. I know they say he's a god, and I know that's what you said you do with Gods where you were from...

But that's not how it works here. The 4th is our friend. He can be our best friend! And he's not above okay?

...If he was... ...why would he play games with us, Ron?

Y-you think uncle Dragon c-can do it? [ His heart is so tight he feels like he's going to explode (though it's more likely that he'll cry so hard that he throws up instead). ]

L-like ice c-cream...? [ That doesn't sound as bad, but... ] But that's st-still not r-right...? [ He gets a small part of it, but not how that makes what they did right. ]

I d-don't know how to be friends with a G-god, it f-feels weird. [ She might have noticed that Ron was awkward when Fourth was around and playing, and it's entirely because he's used to gods you're not supposed to see, or play with, or think of as worth the same as you. God is supposed to be admired and viewed as much better than yourself. ]

I-I don't know.

...Yeah. ...If we give him time...yeah. [Please don't cry. Or vomit. Please.

..She tries more.] ...If the Fog God made everything like Lager Woods...where everything is foggy, and you're always hungry, and scared, and might go crazy...

Would that be better? [She asks, deciding to explain the friend deal after this bit is over with.]

H-how much? [ Which is preferable? Either way he's likely to fall asleep from the exhaustion of such intense emotions. ]

N-no...? I-it's b-bad, right...? [ He can deal with hunger, he'll just eat a person, but he doesn't like being scared. ]

...We should probably wait until at least next month... [She says quietly, moving on.] ...Right.

...That's what would have happened if the 4th didn't pick conduits.

T-that's a really long time... [ What if Robbie forgets they exist by then? ]

B-but... both daddy and uncle Robbie s-said it's... it was b-bad of... God t-to pick me b-because I d-didn't understand... A-are they wr-wrong?

[...That one's tricky. Honestly, she thinks it WAS a bad idea...but that'll only make Ron upset right now, so...]

...Why do you think the 4th picked you?

H-he did it b-because I'm s-stupid and e-easy to get to d-do b-bad things?

[ Tsukikage is a grown-up AND his dad, he trusted him so much, he couldn't just dismiss what he'd told him. And Tsukikage and Robbie never called him stupid, that's just his own words. ]

B-because I'm a v-villjan?

[ See, still upset. ]

Because he trusts you.

[She's just going to frown now.] You're not dumb. And you weren't picked because he wanted you to do a bad thing.

He picked you because he trusted you to help him do what would stop the Fog. You're not a villain, okay?

...You're a hero. And he picked you, and me, and the others, because we were the ones he knew would do our best to help. He knew we'd be able to hide, and stay safe, and keep the secret.

[ He doesn't see the frown, as he's buried his face in his knees, feeling sick and sad. ]

Wh-why would he t-trust me when I've d-done so m-much b-bad stuff?

[She'll try to hug him as best as she can-and explain. ...It's hard, but when it comes to this, she likes to think that the 4th would agree with her.] ...Because he know you don't want to do bad things anymore.

[ He moves his snotty face to Reira's chest and buries his face in her shirt instead. ]

N-nee-san, I don't know if, if I c-can trust h-him r-right now...

[ He has to do a lot of thinking, but his mind is in shambles right this second. ]

[.............It's what everyone says. And it leaves her quiet.] ...Why? [she finally asks.]

...Because of what the others said?

[ Can she really blame him? So much has changed since she got him to join. ] U-uh-huh... S-sorry, p-please don't h-hate me...

...I'm not going to hate you.

[....] ....But remember that Robbie was the one who wouldn't say sorry to Tsukikage. And he's the one who won't listen even when we say Tsukikage isn't mad. He's the one who left, even though Tsukikage is hurting more than everyone else, [she adds quite firmly.]

...Robbie might care, but that doesn't mean he's right right now.

...And until he can see when someone is hurt, instead of pretending they're not, I'm not going to believe what Robbie says about a lot of things.

Especially the things that I know he's wrong about.

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, CCC-REDHORSE. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 134.64.202.69 * CCC-REDHORSE has joined 134.64.202.69 <CCC-REDHORSE> This is Reira Akaba! <CCC-REDHORSE>**I'll try to answer you but sometimes I'm busy or sleeping, so I don't think about the message right away.

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