Muse Name: Foster van Denend State of General Being: Foster is usually a weird blank. He is so low empathy he may in fact be NO empathy. It doesn't matter how many kinds of empathy you define, the result is the same super deficit of it. He also has anhedonia so severe that he's almost completely incapable of deriving enjoyment from just about anything. The emotions he does feel are all pretty driven by his psychosis--and therefore sort of artificially inflated. They're so much more 'real' than reality that he is sort of obligated to act them out, but even when he's doing something obvious like laughing, even if there is a superficial connection to the emotion it represents, beneath the first layer, it just sort of turns back into that devoid state.
The only emotions he can experience with any sincerity are negative; his self-loathing and bitterness can be pretty fucking intense, and if someone's managed to earn his contempt or hate, he does know how to feel that. Otherwise, the most he gets is 'mildly disgruntled' or 'annoyed at an inconvenience but also he doesn't care.'
The only things that really make him happy are... like, being in deliberately inflicted pain, and people just actively depriving him of any rights or free will. The first one is thrilling and intense but also validating and inexplicably stabilising, the second is validating and almost soothing?
Possible Tells/Barriers: Foster's not very subtle about himself--he drools, his buries his claws in his hair, he digs his fingers (well, claws) into existing wounds to stabilise himself. But he is also very much... he's very performative. A lot of what he "feels" isn't definite emotion at all, technically, so much as increasing and decreasing levels of tension or agitation. When he has an 'impression' of something, it's more like a flavour of static, or an extremely disconnected 'vibe' that he can discard by choice or performance, and because he's so poorly in control of his outer state (regardless of inner state!) he often 'acts' more of an emotion that he has.
no subject
State of General Being: Foster is usually a weird blank. He is so low empathy he may in fact be NO empathy. It doesn't matter how many kinds of empathy you define, the result is the same super deficit of it. He also has anhedonia so severe that he's almost completely incapable of deriving enjoyment from just about anything. The emotions he does feel are all pretty driven by his psychosis--and therefore sort of artificially inflated. They're so much more 'real' than reality that he is sort of obligated to act them out, but even when he's doing something obvious like laughing, even if there is a superficial connection to the emotion it represents, beneath the first layer, it just sort of turns back into that devoid state.
The only emotions he can experience with any sincerity are negative; his self-loathing and bitterness can be pretty fucking intense, and if someone's managed to earn his contempt or hate, he does know how to feel that. Otherwise, the most he gets is 'mildly disgruntled' or 'annoyed at an inconvenience but also he doesn't care.'
The only things that really make him happy are... like, being in deliberately inflicted pain, and people just actively depriving him of any rights or free will. The first one is thrilling and intense but also validating and inexplicably stabilising, the second is validating and almost soothing?
Possible Tells/Barriers: Foster's not very subtle about himself--he drools, his buries his claws in his hair, he digs his fingers (well, claws) into existing wounds to stabilise himself. But he is also very much... he's very performative. A lot of what he "feels" isn't definite emotion at all, technically, so much as increasing and decreasing levels of tension or agitation. When he has an 'impression' of something, it's more like a flavour of static, or an extremely disconnected 'vibe' that he can discard by choice or performance, and because he's so poorly in control of his outer state (regardless of inner state!) he often 'acts' more of an emotion that he has.